DeviantArt Entry:

Hey everyone,

I realized and seriously thought that this would be a great time to write something in my log. Besides, I said that I would write something in my log. Well, I could say that my life is on a rather neutral end right now. My life, my great life that is, is on a serious pause. Somehow, I feel that this is what it always seems like. Well, I still like to draw, even though my sense of writing overcomes me all the time.

Sometimes, drawing gets boring though. But I still like to draw most of the time. I’ve only been drawing for at least 2 ½ years, and I feel great. I feel like I’ve gotten really far while drawing, but I’m still aware of the fact that it takes forever to really get good. I ultimately know that I can make something worthy out of drawing, and I’ll be able to make money in the future and support my family as well for my god-given talent too.

Oh, and yes, I still do stay up late, and I don’t really play the game too much anymore. I used to be so used to playing the DBZ series. But my sense and my interest for that slowly died down over the years, and then I started to get into fantasy games, like the FF (final fantasy) series. At the time that I was playing DBZ, I was also playing the Naruto games as well. I was recently at a card collectible store and they had one of the Naruto games in the back, where the others hung out to play the games, and all the different card games. Well, my friend and I walk up in there, and we get on the game, and start to whip everybody up in there. It was kind of funny, though. We ran right through the others in there, and I seriously haven’t been playing the Naruto series very often.

Well, other than the card store, I haven’t been doing much of anything lately, except reading my Bible. It’s kind of funny because I never really concentrated on reading in school as much as I do today. By the way, I have already graduated from school, year of 2008. Ever since then, my life has been reduced to a very small point of living. It’s not to say that I am suffering, or I am in trouble with money issues. I’m just saying that I am trying to find a job, and continue up the ladder with my life. Ever since school had ended, things instantly changed ever since that day. I’ve recently sent out a lot of applications to different employers struggling to look for someone to work, even if where I work is a little rundown. Making money is what matters most in today’s devastated economy. Once I can do that, I can move to college.

That is another topic of great struggle that I hate to talk about. I still have not made it to college. Maybe my expectations are a bit too deep. I know that the economy is struggling, so I am thinking of a smaller more focused college that focuses on the same degree that I am interested in. I’m into game design. I find out that I really love playing a lot of games. I hate to contradict myself, but my passion for game design has not dwindled at all because I used to play games a lot, and up till today, I still play the games from the years ago, and now I am into the final fantasy games. I choose to pick up final fantasy 12. I heard a lot of people talking about the game, so I ended up going to the store and buying the game. I also checked out the gameplay on a video web-hosting site, and it looked pretty sweet. I never fully realized my knack for fantasy titles.

Anyways, I guess I could go to the next topic, and that would be whether or not I currently have a girlfriend? Well, the answer is no. Surprisingly, I’ve still been single since my last break-up in high school, and that is a bit weird to me. What kind of upsets me is that one of my friends is trying to help me get a girlfriend, and now that I think on it, I feel that he is trying to move a bit too fast with finding me a girlfriend, and I seriously hate that. What is also surprising is that I just recently found out through my family that they believe my friend is trying to find love at a quick rate, almost as if he is just trying to be loved, and they believe he acts like this because he, like everyone else, have had their fair share of rights and wrongs in the past. I’ve told him before that it’s not good to always rush your way into a relationship because that may make the woman feel overwhelmed, and she could drop you. Once that happens, your heart becomes betrayed and lost all because of your own blind decision. But I am not going to sit here and tell people that they are wrong for doing the things that they like to do. Everyone is different, and everyone will do what they wish, or desire. But don’t do it to me. My time, just like everyone, will come, and I will get my chances when I am meant to receive them. Those chances will be my opportunities. My opportunities will either be my success, or my failure. I’ve even told others in my family that I want to find my own chance and my own girl that I love on my own. Basically, I just don’t want to be pushed into a relationship because I feel like I would just trying to find love, and ultimately, I’ll feel as if I would be trying to just be with someone just to be with someone, or just to use them. Because I am naturally shy, and enclosed around others, my friend thinks that I don’t like girls or something, but he always claims that he is joking about everything he does or says. Sometimes, I feel like he expects me to laugh with me when he laughs, but I don’t, and then ask him, “What’s so funny?” or, “That’s not funny at all” I won’t say it rudely. I will just tell him that it isn’t funny, and then he gets down, like I was supposed to laugh. My friend is kind of weird. But I’m kind of weird as well. And we both have our own difference in problems. He also tells me that I have issues…like everyone else, numb nuts!

Lately, I have just been a little bit stressed out from the arguing and compounding problems from the family. My friend tells me that I have issues, and I feel worse about the stress. But I don’t expect him to fully understand everything about my feelings. I just have to get over it. Well, I am going to finish up this entry with the conclusion.

Conclusion: Here is where I end the last of this entry. Thanks for reading this entry. I appreciate your interest in reading this, and I’ll be back with another in a couple thousand of years!